Useful Information
Spirit Lifters
- Bring in a nail care kit and give your relative a manicure.
- Make up a scrap book of comic strips found in some of the daily papers.
- Make another scrap book with puzzles, word games, and crosswords. Cut them out from the daily papers or magazines. It’s even better if you can get the answers which usually appear in the following day’s paper.
- Painting is a very therapeutic pastime. Your relative might like to have a painting by numbers set.
- Bring their pet to visit if they have one, but obtain the matron’s permission first.
- Some ladies are delighted with a perfume spray, it makes them feel special.
- Many people like to do jigsaw puzzles. Get a reasonably small one that’s not too complicated to start with.
- If they enjoy this pastime you might like to get them a jigsaw roll which rolls up with the puzzle inside. The jigsaw remains as it was left and pieces stay intact. Don’t buy one until you’re sure they will use it.
- In hot weather a fan would be appreciated. A cooling cologne stick is also welcome.
- Lavender bags will keep clothing and drawers smelling nice.
- Provided your relative is not on any special diet or is diabetic, they might like to have a dish of wrapped sweets in their room. Some residents enjoy offering staff a sweet when they come in to attend to them.
- Your relative may appreciate some flowers providing they are not allergic to them. Sweet smelling freesias perfume the room. Most homes seem to be short of vases, bring an inexpensive vase for them. Don’t forget to mark the vase with their name.
- Christian folk love to have passages from the Bible read to them. They often have favourite readings, such as the Psalms. They might appreciate it if you read a few verses to them. Alternatively you could borrow from the library or buy them an audio tape or CD of sacred music or passages from the Bible from a Scripture or Bible shop. Make sure they have the right equipment to play it. A Walkman type of machine could be useful.
Deterioration Of Health And Dying
You will be called if your relative’s health deteriorates and given the option of visiting. The doctor will be notified of the deterioration and may visit, depending on when they last examined them. A nurse is usually detailed to sit with them.
When their pulse and respiration has ceased and they appear to have passed away, the doctor will be notified and will come to certify death as soon as possible. Sometimes the doctor will write the death certificate at the time or may leave it at the surgery for you to pick up.
All the details of their wishes should have been recorded in their notes at the time of admission.
Your relative’s contract should tell you the number of days you have to clear the room of all their personal belongings without extra charges being incurred.
If your relative has been allowed to have a pet, it will have to be removed after their death unless the matron decides it could stay at the home for the benefit of the other residents.
What Happens When My Relative Dies?
The procedure will be different if your relative is not a Protestant.
If they are of the Jewish faith, the Rabbi must be notified when death is imminent. They will make all the arrangements for attending to them and their removal when the time comes. In a case like this the staff are not allowed to touch them after they have passed away, unless specific instructions have been given. A similar situation arises in some other religions. It is essential for you to have given the matron details of your relative’s requirements at the time of their admission.
After the doctor has certified death, your relative will be taken by the undertaker of your choice to a chapel of rest until the death certificate and further instructions from the next of kin have been received.
The room will have to be cleared and all accounts settled within a given time (see the contract).
Some matrons like to send somebody to the funeral to represent the home and would be grateful if you notify them of the date, time and place where this will be held.