Pain, Current Illness And Prognosis

Take notes about the amount of pain, if any, your relative suffers from. It would be useful to find out what medication they take to keep them relatively pain free. Severe pain is sometimes treated at a pain clinic, to which their doctor would refer them if it was thought necessary.

If they have a current illness you might like to see their doctor and ask how best to help them. The doctor may be willing to discuss your relative’s future management with you.

Pressure Sores

A few people who are not really able to care for themselves any longer develop pressure sores on their sacrum, elbows, heels and other places, in fact anywhere where there is constant unrelieved pressure on the body. Sacral sores can be made worse by incontinence. The matron will want to know if your relative is suffering from any skin condition including pressure sores so the problem can be assessed by the doctor and treated.

Breathing

Many people suffer from breathing difficulties, such as emphysema or severe asthma. If your relative has this kind of difficulty, they may have been prescribed oxygen (as directed) and will have an oxygen cylinder near to hand. They may need to take this with them but usually the home can get a replacement on prescription. You would need to check this out with the matron.

Speech, Hearing And Sight

Being unable to speak coherently with clear diction is not an illness but may be due to congenital or life-long deafness. Today deaf children are fitted with hearing aids and taught to speak but 80 years ago many deaf children had little or no help at all. They grew up completely deaf and with few communication skills. Speech difficulties can also be caused by a Stroke (CVA), shock, trauma or a lack of speech training in childhood.

Impaired sight can mostly be improved with spectacles or surgery, removal of cataracts is very successful. Unfortunately, not everybody benefits from treatment and their sight deteriorates in time.

Make a note of hearing aids and batteries your relative has if they are deaf, the number of pairs of glasses they may have and any other aids your relative uses.

Psychological Needs

Does your relative suffer from any mental illness such as senile dementia or Alzheimer’s disease? If they do they will probably be happier if they are placed in an EMI (elderly mentally infirm) home where the nurses are trained to care for residents with this type of illness. However, you, as their relative, may find it distressing at first (see Chapter 3).

Personality

The dictionary tells us that personality is the distinctive character or qualities of a person as distinct from other people.

Everybody has been created in a unique fashion. Everybody has a different personality. This needs to be taken into consideration when looking for a home where they will be cared for.

Some people are extroverted whilst others are introverted. Some people always seem to be anxious whilst others are placid. At this stage it is wise to make notes of all these things. When you start to search for the best home it is very easy to forget details such as these.

Fear

Many elderly people have developed fears over the years, often ones that have developed from incidents in their earlier life.

Many elderly people develop a fear of going into a residential home of any kind. Their main fear seems to be their loss of independence and privacy. If these fears can be determined and allayed, it will help the person to replace fear with positive thinking and anticipation.

Attitude

Attitude is a settled opinion or way of thinking. Body language and behaviour can often reflect a person’s attitude.

You may already have noticed that your relative has a settled opinion towards the way in which procedures should be carried out, for instance, the way their home is kept clean, or the way food should be prepared and cooked.

They may have an ingrained attitude towards some people, maybe because they are of a different race, or different religion. However wrong we may feel these attitudes are they can be difficult to change. A lot of tolerance and patience is needed, especially if their attitude towards residential care is negative (see Nellie’s Story at the end of the chapter).